Not like the crack that you put in a pipe. But crack on your forehead here's a towel now wipe .

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--Props to Pearland for getting as far as it got. It just ran into a couple of buzz saws over the weekend. Always love it when a team from around these here parts gets to Williamsport.

--Gotta love the love for Modern Family at the Emmys.

Only thing better than it winning some awards was Breaking Bad picking up two wins for Bryan Cranston and Aaron Paul. Cranston’s 3rd straight win and it should be Paul’s 2nd straight win.
I was kinda hoping for a sentimental upset of Lost over Mad Men (mostly just to see everyone together one more time), but obviously can’t complain about Mad Men getting Best Drama. It was nice to see Sal up there on the stage. I didn’t see Glen, but @creepyglen is now following me so I guess I can ask him if he was there.
I was hoping against hope Friday Night Lights would get a nod for Principal Taylor, but the Taylors will just have to settle for beating Dillon.
I guess I need to see this Temple Grandin HBO movie.
Because it can’t be repeated enough, Katey Sagal was robbed of a nomination, much less a very deserving win for Sons of Anarchy.

Jimmy Fallon’s opening number was great with all the Glee’ers, Joel McHale, Tina Fey and the dancing machine known as Jon Hamm. I assume that was the only reason Kate Gosselin was invited to the freakin’ Emmys. Other than that there wasn’t much to talk or laugh about. And for the love of God television please stop trying to incorporate twitter into your broadcasts. Oh and nice job giving all of a minute to introduce the nominees for Best Drama, I mean having to use Ted Danson’s canned intros was just pathetic.

--Don Draper, I don’t even know who you are anymore. You’re embarrassing yourself and you’re giving a bad name to drinking in the work place.
Looooved seeing Victor Kiriakis officiate the CLIOs. Though it shoulda been Stefano or
Tony Dimera yelling at him instead of Duck.

Father/Daughter

--Chronic nerve pain can be helped by smoking marijuana?! Really? Is marijuana like medicinal or something? Whoa, who knew?

--How’d that taste Dallas? Not gonna get too high or too low on a preseason game, but that was fun. And holy crap Cowboys, Swiss cheese takes offense at your offensive line being called Swiss cheese. That was the game right there. If Tony Romo had time maybe their starters actually put up a score or maybe not. It’s not like he was making great throws on the off chance he had protection.
I’m gonna go ahead and say that Jacoby Jones will end up with more TDs this year than Andre Johnson. He is going to torch 3rd and 4th corners. This offense is so damn good until it hits the red zone. As soon as the Texans hit the 20 its like the entire offense gets a kryptonite necklace around its neck. Next up the Bucs in a game that not even a mother could love, much less watch.

--Vanity Fair with a nice interview with the lovely Mary Louise Parker. Among other things she talks about is how she thinks Nancy Botwin should have sex with a woman. So yeah, good interview.

And apparently she cooks...maybe...does it matter?

--Really U.S. Soccer?! Bob Bradley again?! I hate you.

--I’ll RT myself regarding this week’s Sunny block: “So I found out there’s a name for what Houston’s pro sports teams do to us. It’s called The D.E.N.N.I.S. System.”
Awesome, awesome episode.

--Like the Saints? Derek Fisher is speaking to the team before their opener about the challenges of winning back to back. I won’t hold it against you New Orleans…much.

--Uhhh, on second thought Bengals, maybe signing Antonio Bryant to a contract that had $6.95 million in roster bonuses he reached in March only to release him in August wasn’t the best contract you’ve ever cobbled together…unless nearly $7 million for a guy who never took a regular season snap for you is the going rate. The White Sox think that’s a questionable decision and they just spent $4 million for 30 games from Manny Ramirez.

--As is usually the case when I go in with little expectations for a UFC event it delivers, go in with high expectations and it fails. I had high expectations for UFC 118 so there ya go. Randy Couture and James Toney went like everyone expected it to go. BJ Penn vs. Frankie Edgar didn’t go how most thought and the way Edgar dominated it was just 5 rounds of boring. Gray Maynard is usually pretty boring, but a nice win for him over Kenny Florian. Strong win for Nate Diaz over veteran Marcus Davis whose face has more scar tissue than Ric Flair’s by now. When Joe Lauzon is one, Joe Lauzon is on! He was on! Saturday night.

--It all evens out in the end…two drafts last weekend. I had the first pick and the 11th. Two down, two to go.

--As someone who lives downtown and has long since passed the point I can tolerate punk teenagers in the theater I hate to see the Angelika close. I heard some interviews from passersby on channel 13. One guy said, “I hope they don’t put up an atrocity in its place.” Uhhh, “atrocity” might be a bit strong.

--Jon Hamm back to 30 Rock for a bit sounds good to me. Last season the 7 o’ clock shows kicked the crap out of the more known 8 o’ clock shows. This season, well in case you forgot, NBC put Outsourced in Parks and Recreation’s spot and pushed Parks back. NBC = Genius, but you knew that already.

--Some things you shouldn’t need to tell kids in high school. Like in electrical trades class does the teacher really need to tell you not to put electrical clamps on each nipple and then plug in the power cord? That seemed like a good idea at some point? This happened in New Hampshire and the moron in question, Kyle Dubois is, of course, suing the teacher over this. Look, I’m sorry you claim you have permanent brain damage because of this. But your dumbass is one of many reasons people don’t want to be teachers.

--Deadspin’s latest Dead Wrestler of the Week is Owen Hart. It’s another outstanding piece about one of the most genuinely liked guys who ever entered the ring. I remember hearing the news that Sunday night and I couldn’t believe it. If you didn’t tear up watching that Raw tribute the next day then you had no soul.

--Wired.co.uk has an interesting story about being able to press your ashes into a vinyl record for the ones you left behind to remember you by. You can choose to have whatever music you wish on the record as well as your ashes. Or you can go without music and you just get pops and crackles when you play it which would be pretty damn freaky to listen to. I’m not going the cremation route because there ain’t no way I’m gonna blow a chance at zombie adventures.

--Multi-Tasker of the Week comes to us from Ohio. ‘Twas there that Colondra Hamilton was driving around Elmwood Place. Driving takes some concentration especially if you’re doing it while watching porn. Porn was playing on her laptop which her kind passenger was holding up for her to see. Okay, that’s a little odd, but people look at their phones all the time while driving so she can probably do all that. Wait, she had a sex toy in her lap too?! Uhhh, you may just want to pull over Colondra. She didn’t. Instead a cop pulled her over for illegal window tinting and the cop has a story that can’t be topped.

--I like True Blood especially since I’ve cut it down to maybe 30 minutes a week by fast-forwarding anytime I see Tara, Sam, Jason, the redhead who’s married to Ben Linus in real-
life, and especially that guy who is bringing down a once strong character in Lafayette.

--Who cares about who wins Dancing With the Stars? It’s all about who the first loser is. First losers of the past include Kenny Mayne, Josie Maran, Penn Jillette and Jeffrey Ross.
This season I’m gonna go with Michael Bolton as the first loser slightly ahead of Margaret Cho.

A little too much clothing for a Dancing With The Stars costume.

--Love this choice for a Cinematical “Scenes We Love.” House Party is a classic that is one of those that if I stumble upon I’m not changing until it’s over. You got Kid, Play, Martin Lawrence aka Dragonbreath, Tisha Campbell-Martin, the guys who always smelled something, and the always outstanding Robin Harris.
Courtesy of IMDB, they shot this scene without the music. The toe-touch never gets old.


--If you don’t like your sister and don’t like your job and your job is working at Wendy’s for your sister, the manager, well what do you do? If you’re Gregory Chambers in Galveston you go on a smear campaign and yes, the smear part of the equation involves feces. Apparently Gregory liked smearing crap all over the Wendy’s storefront and just trashing the place. He liked it enough that eventually police staked it one night and now Gregory is doing whatever people who enjoy handling feces do in jail.

Questions, comments or if you roll with Kid ‘n’ Play