It's Five Dollars Extra Get The Porno Flicks
Sometimes You’re Tracy. Sometimes You’re The Sheep
You saw it. You knew it was gonna come down to this. No need to look back at Game 6, just gotta take care of business in Game 7. Don’t sing it, bring it!
C'mon Tracy show us you got big ones.
That Made Sense, You Feelin Okay?
Hard not to like what the Texans did on draft day, particularly the first round. Amobi Okoye was the one guy I wanted most for this team and somehow he was still there at 10. How can you not want a guy who was in elementary school at two and a half years of age? Who graduated high school at 15? Who got his first collegiate sack at 16? Who was accepted at Harvard? Who graduated from Louisville with a psychology degree at 19? Who told ESPNNews that he "almost peed himself" when the Texans selected him? You can't pass on that kid. The Texans didn't and avoided something monumentally stupid (sounds familiar) like taking Ted Ginn Jr. had he been on the board like Adam Schefter reported.
--Second halves of Texans' preseason games may actually be worth watching with Boise State's Jared Zabransky now on board.
--Former Baytown Lee and Iowa QB Drew Tate signed with the Rams.
--I'm not sure about the Randy Moss trade from New England's perspective seeing as how he's sucked the past couple of years and isn't the most hard-working of players, but why the hell not take the gamble. He does have 101 career TD catches and if you add up the totals of every Patriots receiver they had last year that comes to only 61, the bulk of which, of course, were provided by Jabar Gaffney. Tom Brady will be getting a lot of love come fantasy draft time.
--Long snapper David Binn of the Chargers is giving hope to long snappers everywhere as he is apparently smashing Pamela Anderson.
--Oh yeah...EAT IT DALLAS!!!!!!!!!!
Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts
--Troy Hudson has an album dropping soon titled "Undrafted." So be looking for that bad boy in a bargain bin near you.
--Elisabeth Shue wants to be a professional tennis player?!
--Holy crap last week's Office was the best this season. So many lines,
Michael: "We need two men on this…that's what she said….not now….but she did."
Kelly: "This day is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S"
Andy: "God…beer me some strength."And of course Dwight and Jim impersonating each other was just a little funny.
--Best news all week: The Pacific Ocean version of Band of Brothers is a go for HBO.
--"You Got Got! You Got Got! You Got Got!" Two pilots in one season. It's Drama's world we're just lucky enough to have courtside seats for it.
--Props to Juan Diaz for handling his business against Acelino Freitas. Hopefully Joel Casamayor is up next and then maybe Manny Pacquiao which would be just a little good. As far as Oscar and Floyd does I’ll take Oscar by decision in my heart. In my head I’ll go Floyd by decision.
--F’n Heroes is the best show on television since I don’t know when! Seriously who doesn't root for Hiro, but who wouldn't have minded seeing him be delayed in the future a bit longer so we could see Sylar and Peter square off? Sylar as Nathan was just too damn sweeeeet. If for reasons unknown you are not watching this then you have to get the DVD set when it drops (do DVDs "drop"?).
wants some?
Who wants some?
--How draining is watching The Shield week in and week out? F'n dumbass Shane. Dutch on one way The Shield will wrap up the series next season: “There's this joke that the final shot of 'The Shield’ will be of Vic Mackey. But the penultimate shot is of Dutch coming home and unlocking his front door, unlocking a door within his house, going down a set of steps to a group of people chained up in various states of decomposition. And the final line (of the scene) is, ‘Who had a good day?'""
--What I learned this week…thingamajig and doohickey do not pop up on spell-check, but whatchamacallit does. Now you know. Yes, my paper money job sometimes leads me to type in random words to see if they come up on spell-check. You got a better timewaster that doesn't involve getting online?
--Nothing like the ol' "Wait, I gave you a $20, not a $10" conversation with the gas station cashier. Usually one of you is right and realizes what happens, make the correction and everybody lives happily ever after. Sometimes though…In Florida the other day Walter General Jr. was in a gas station and told the clerk that he handed him a $20, not a $10. The clerk disagreed. Walter stabbed the clerk in the stomach while yelling "Keep the change, motherf******!!!" Then Walter jumped over the counter and tried to open the register, but it wouldn't so he banged the cashier's head on it until it finally cracked open and then he lifted the cashier's bloody f'n head and told him to look at the $20 that was in there and Walter dared the cashier to tell him that that wasn't the $20 Walter handed him. But there was no $20 so Walter looked at the stack of $10s and realized the top one was his because his 5 year old daughter wrote her name with a heart dotting the 'i' on it and it read "I heart Daddy." Walter told the cashier, "Huh, whaddya know, you were right. My bad" and he walked away.
Or Walter stabbed the clerk in the stomach and the police came and arrested him, but that story is so much more boring.
--Whoa, whoa that wasn’t even New York’s mom, but an actress on I Love New York?! Shocking, I know.
--Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon?!
--Seriously a lawyer in Washington is not suing a mom and pop dry cleaners for $67 million because they lost his favorite pants that he wanted to wear on his first day on the bench, right? I mean that still can't be in the court system, right? Wrong. Roy Pearson is the guy who should get his license to practice revoked not to mention be removed from the bench. F'n ludicrous. The moron came up with $67 million because he's charging them for 10 years of weekend car rentals so he can take his clothes to another dry cleaner.
--I'm not saying Florida is the stupidest state in the country seeing as how Tennessee and Mississippi are still around, but…State Senator Jim King wished that when it was his time that he could be buried with the ashes of his Great Lab. However, Florida funeral laws forbid that so now Governor Crist is being asked to sign a bill allowing the remains of pets, if in separate urns, to join their owners in their eternal rest spot.
Questions, comments or if you've ever had a happier day than Field Day back in elementary school…
